Flick: No questions, we need answers | Columnists


In a life of far too few answers, there are still more questions:

• How can it be a “free” drink when I just paid $650 for the plane ticket?

• Has anyone ever seen Boris Johnson use a comb?

• If the Bloomington-born Steak ‘n Shake chain sponsored one of BloNo’s other major entities — the summer Shakespeare Festival at legendary Ewing Castle — would it call it Steak ‘n Shakespeare?

• Why does the person who snores always fall asleep first?

• In the midst of all the massive gun violence and endless debates over whether or not more laws are needed, isn’t it time to also begin studying America’s growing mental health issues that inexplicably drive violence? senseless?

• If the “felt” temperature is 107, isn’t this then, in all cases, the real temperature?

• What happened to those Cialis ads where a couple sat in separate tubs next to each other? They finally become too shriveled?

• Is it ironic that Normal Community High is the furthest school building from the center of the Normal community?

• If mortgage interest rates are at their highest in decades, how come savings interest rates on things like CDs and savings accounts also remain among the lowest in decades ?

• Is the common bond between all of humanity that each of us believes that we are an above average driver?

• Although a pleasant and convenient airport, is there a more curious name than Peoria International Airport? Only a handful of flights depart from Illinois!

• When Queen Elizabeth or Prince Charles have to sign their surname on a form, what exactly do they sign? What is their surname?


– (From Virginia Lowery, Towanda): “Did you notice that to start the car, we used to pump the throttle once or twice to prime it before turning the key, but now we do exactly the opposite and instead hit the brake to the floor and I don’t even have a key!?”

— (From David Messenger, Normal): “With the emergence of electric vehicles, will there be any who refuse to buy them because they don’t make the loud, powerful sound of a motor vehicle with a modified muffler? Or will someone become a billionaire by developing an electric device to make the electric vehicle roar instead of driving quietly? »

— (From James A. Henderson, Bloomington): “In the end, isn’t retirement just 50% of the time wondering if it’s too late for coffee and 50% of the time wondering if it’s too early for alcohol?

Flick: She’s got her big break – but it’s an elbow

• In a state of nearly 13 million people, 58,000 square miles, and only 59 state senators to cover it all, how come Bloomington-Normal now has sort of three state senators — with the State Senators Sally Turner, Dave Koehler and Jason Barickman each serving different sections of cities?

• What happens if my car radio wasn’t too loud the last time I got out of it, it’s still WAY TOO LOUD when I go back in?

• The Colosseum in Rome went into ruin for lack of use for civic entertainment. Will the Coliseum in downtown Bloomington suffer the same unfortunate fate?

• Do you remember when people dressed to fly on an airplane? Now it looks like we’re all ready to mow the yard.

• How long before we have wedding photos of the bride and groom saying “yes”, when at that time the minister is standing between them and taking the selfie?

• Or has it already happened?

• At Illinois State University, shouldn’t a restaurant in the student union food court be called Bone Appetit? Or soup bone? Or, since it doesn’t serve alcohol, Bone Dry?

• Why is it that if you try to catch an elevator the door always closes, but if you are already in the elevator the doors never seem to close and you always press the “close door” button ?

Bill Flick is at [email protected]


Comments are closed.